1. Down to Bellihock
2. Deception of the Sixth-Hour
3. Lesson in Genuineness
4. A World Without Fairies
5. Picturesque
2. Deception of the Sixth-Hour
3. Lesson in Genuineness
4. A World Without Fairies
5. Picturesque
Down to Bellihock
"Of all the sundry repertoires!" shouted the Queen to her Jester as she watched unbelievingly...
He stood on his head with his bare feet flailing in the air while juggling his shoes and socks!
"What foolishness is this?" she cried.
"I am jesting, your Majesty." he replied.
"Jesting?! This is pure idiocy!" the Queen ranted. "Of all the royal idiots I've appointed, you are the most idiotic!"
At this, the jester began to cry and his juggling slowly began to cease. His shoes and socks hit the floor and he began to melt. Soon thereafter, the Queen beheld a pool of turbulent clown tears dyed in the brightest colors by his melted clown attire. And in this pool floated two socks and two shoes.
"Ah ha!" she screamed. "I will call it 'Footwear Clown-Tear Soup' and serve it to Bellihock.” (the dragon of the castle dungeon)
And so she had her servants scoop up the melted clown concoction and cart it downstairs into the dungeon. At the time, Bellihock was partaking in his regularly scheduled dragon activities ... you know (breathing fire, roaring, thrashing around in all directions like a beast gone mad) ... When they threw the Footwear Clown-Tear Soup onto the dungeon floor, Bellihock gobbled it up quickly. Immediately he let out a god-awful-roar so loud that all of the servants fell down. Then, his eyes began to cross and to glow in the brightest hues. Bellihock was soon on his back spewing hysterical dragon laughter in breaths of the wildest fire throughout the entire kingdom ...
One of the servants yelled "He's gone mad!" and they all ran back upstairs frightened. The Queen inquired, "What is that awful noise?" "It's Bellihock. He's gone mad!" a servant replied. And the laughter got louder and louder. And the fire got wilder and wilder...until the flames had traveled through the pre-dungeon cavern up to the rest of the castle and began burning up everything. In a haze of laughter & fire, the Queen and all of her servants tried to escape. But all of the walls were engulfed in flame & all of the halls were filled with laughter. So they scrambled frantically and hopelessly about as the laughing burning castle plummeted into the dungeon (completely burying Bellihock, I might add.) Then all was silent and a few embers glowed that burned out shortly after.
*Moral of the story: be careful what you feed your dragon.
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He stood on his head with his bare feet flailing in the air while juggling his shoes and socks!
"What foolishness is this?" she cried.
"I am jesting, your Majesty." he replied.
"Jesting?! This is pure idiocy!" the Queen ranted. "Of all the royal idiots I've appointed, you are the most idiotic!"
At this, the jester began to cry and his juggling slowly began to cease. His shoes and socks hit the floor and he began to melt. Soon thereafter, the Queen beheld a pool of turbulent clown tears dyed in the brightest colors by his melted clown attire. And in this pool floated two socks and two shoes.
"Ah ha!" she screamed. "I will call it 'Footwear Clown-Tear Soup' and serve it to Bellihock.” (the dragon of the castle dungeon)
And so she had her servants scoop up the melted clown concoction and cart it downstairs into the dungeon. At the time, Bellihock was partaking in his regularly scheduled dragon activities ... you know (breathing fire, roaring, thrashing around in all directions like a beast gone mad) ... When they threw the Footwear Clown-Tear Soup onto the dungeon floor, Bellihock gobbled it up quickly. Immediately he let out a god-awful-roar so loud that all of the servants fell down. Then, his eyes began to cross and to glow in the brightest hues. Bellihock was soon on his back spewing hysterical dragon laughter in breaths of the wildest fire throughout the entire kingdom ...
One of the servants yelled "He's gone mad!" and they all ran back upstairs frightened. The Queen inquired, "What is that awful noise?" "It's Bellihock. He's gone mad!" a servant replied. And the laughter got louder and louder. And the fire got wilder and wilder...until the flames had traveled through the pre-dungeon cavern up to the rest of the castle and began burning up everything. In a haze of laughter & fire, the Queen and all of her servants tried to escape. But all of the walls were engulfed in flame & all of the halls were filled with laughter. So they scrambled frantically and hopelessly about as the laughing burning castle plummeted into the dungeon (completely burying Bellihock, I might add.) Then all was silent and a few embers glowed that burned out shortly after.
*Moral of the story: be careful what you feed your dragon.
Deception of the Sixth Hour
Penguin delegates of the lowest rank ride plankton into a coldwater pocket beneath. Flapping and squinting as the temperature of their surrounding environment drops rapidly, they formulate their two cents: considering specific wording, wing gestures, and final execution. As the plankton pull them into the pocket, each penguin swims gently aside to allow the procession to continue and eventually cease. When all twelve have dismounted ...and there are most certainly twelve of them, never eleven / never thirteen, but twelve - one for each hour in a half-day, they form two parallel lines of six each facing one another.
At once, the zero-hour penguin swims to the head and begins to address the coldwater delegation ... “Peace berates the sacred manifolds of penguinly dissonance held optimal by the Antarctic Insurrectionary Theorist Brigade.” All the penguins nod and wiggle their wings a bit. The first-hour penguin swims up, “The secondary artery in the plankton transport system is crematory and glow-bug laden.” All but the sixth-hour penguin nod and wiggle their wings. The second-hour penguin swims up, "Philanthropy among flightless birds could melt the thick ice of the east.” No nodding this time; instead, adjacent penguins commence discussion while participating in a bit of involuntary wing wiggling. The third-hour penguin swims up, “Climbing abaft the abandon shaft, I saw it! A time-bomb in the pocket of our predecessors.” All of the penguins (except sixth-hour) cry aloud and flap their stubby wings in terror. As they calm down, the fourth-hour penguin swims up, “Long live the sacred manifolds of penguinly dissonance! Long live the thick ice of the east!” All penguins (but 6th-hour) cheer. The fifth-hour penguin swims up, “Perpetual vacillation keeps alive a coldwater penguin delegation.” All the penguins except sixth-hour swim around joyfully chanting, “CWPD! CWPD!” When they finally calm down, they stare at sixth-hour questioningly. Sixth-hour remains still...
WHOOOOOOOOSH!!!!! The penguin they were staring at rapidly breaks into a million tiny plankton who swim in all directions simultaneously. ~ A look of horror freezes onto the faces of the remaining eleven penguin delegates. Then ninth-hour yells out, “Murderous Plankton Spies!!!” ~ They intensely mourn the loss of their sixth-hour and the successful unforeseen infiltration of their sacred penguin delegation.
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At once, the zero-hour penguin swims to the head and begins to address the coldwater delegation ... “Peace berates the sacred manifolds of penguinly dissonance held optimal by the Antarctic Insurrectionary Theorist Brigade.” All the penguins nod and wiggle their wings a bit. The first-hour penguin swims up, “The secondary artery in the plankton transport system is crematory and glow-bug laden.” All but the sixth-hour penguin nod and wiggle their wings. The second-hour penguin swims up, "Philanthropy among flightless birds could melt the thick ice of the east.” No nodding this time; instead, adjacent penguins commence discussion while participating in a bit of involuntary wing wiggling. The third-hour penguin swims up, “Climbing abaft the abandon shaft, I saw it! A time-bomb in the pocket of our predecessors.” All of the penguins (except sixth-hour) cry aloud and flap their stubby wings in terror. As they calm down, the fourth-hour penguin swims up, “Long live the sacred manifolds of penguinly dissonance! Long live the thick ice of the east!” All penguins (but 6th-hour) cheer. The fifth-hour penguin swims up, “Perpetual vacillation keeps alive a coldwater penguin delegation.” All the penguins except sixth-hour swim around joyfully chanting, “CWPD! CWPD!” When they finally calm down, they stare at sixth-hour questioningly. Sixth-hour remains still...
WHOOOOOOOOSH!!!!! The penguin they were staring at rapidly breaks into a million tiny plankton who swim in all directions simultaneously. ~ A look of horror freezes onto the faces of the remaining eleven penguin delegates. Then ninth-hour yells out, “Murderous Plankton Spies!!!” ~ They intensely mourn the loss of their sixth-hour and the successful unforeseen infiltration of their sacred penguin delegation.
Lesson in Genuineness
Curious dace eavesdrops from a former-wadi and hears a clearly hackneyed gabfest between three quadrupeds and a legume from laburnum. Always obdurate in the presence of land dwellers and their ideas, this dace has been repeatedly earmarked a xenophobe by them ... however, it is rumored to be written in the Quadrupedal Cabala (which is undoubtedly a vade mecum for all four legged mammals) that on the day you pass a kale before your path & the never-rabid former-wadi wafts the curious dace downstream, far out of eavesdropping range, an inevitable breakdown of zeitgeist will follow, existing ibidem with any quadrupedal gabfest in progress at the time, and subsequently transforming it into a babel. Now you understand the importance of nosey xenophobic dace.
*Moral of the story: every gabfest must be thought hackneyed by someone or it can never be thought genuine by another.
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*Moral of the story: every gabfest must be thought hackneyed by someone or it can never be thought genuine by another.
A World Without Fairies
At last the fairies of the world have come clean! Last night they open-heartedly admitted their longtime addiction to various forms of booger sugar. When confronted with many astonished faces, they replied simply, “What did you think fairy dust was?” They were transported by train to the Springfield Center of Rehabilitation and Self-Awareness in western Massachusetts. Hopefully they will have a full recovery and remember how to fly without the help of harmful and illegal drugs ... until then, we will exist in a world without fairies!
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Picturesque
Greetings remain obfuscated notwithstanding a hidden joyousness. Feigning caution is a requirement of supposedly adversarial species. In all of the moments that pass while each secretly eyes the other, anxiousness rushes to fill voids left by bits of disappearing joy. What was once only facade slowly manifests itself, internally as it must. To an observer in the trees no change is noticeable, and the heightened tension is no more real than was its semblance. But the imminent potentially hazardous encounter is sufficient to warrant continued motionlessness.
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